Just call me Supermom? Did I really write that? It must have been the bacon talking because I don’t feel like that at all. Sure, that moment in time I had all my sh!t together and all my children ducks in a row, so to speak, so was feeling slightly superior to the rude people who felt that my load was too heavy. Truthfully, I usually I feel like I’m barley keeping my head above water.

My house in a lesson in chaos; laundry to be folded makes huge drifts in my bedroom while the kitchen needs to be clean and decluttered…again! The girls’ room is covered with clean and dirty clothes; it’s a constant battle to teach them the uses of the hamper and the dressers. There are no toys covering every surface but that is only because I had a major melt down a few weeks ago a bagged up every toy in the house (other than a few odds and ends for Zboy) and threw them into the garage. The girls can earn back sets of toys by picking up after themselves and keeping their room clean… so far NOT ONE toy has been saved from exile. They play quiet happily in the playroom now with an old shoe box, a rubber band, and a tissue, making Zman and me wonder why we have all the toys in the first place. We are now placing bets on how long they will go without the toys and when we can start making some of them disappear for good.

I feel like there isn’t enough of me to go around. Zboy is in the anxious attachment phase right now and needs to be in constant contact with me. This means that if I’m making dinner he is fussing and whining at my feet while attempting to pull my pants off. When I’m sitting down giving him the attention he craves, Cookie is jealous and wants to crawl all over me. Her “Look at me, Look at me” behavior is as understandable as it is maddening. She has done really well with the transition from baby of the family to big sister but it’s still rough sometimes. Princess, as the BIG girl, gets the shaft. I try to make special one-on-one time for her after the younger kids are in bed but usually by then I’m all touched out and just want a little peace and quite.

I’m a good mom, but not a flawless one.

Last night, we all went out to dinner with our local adoption support group to celebrate my friend Sarah’s Ethiopian court date. (Her new daughter is only 1.5 weeks older than Zboy!) As I chased my son from one end of the restaurant to the other, held him while he screamed because he wanted to play IN the restaurant’s fish tank, thanked God that the place was almost empty, tried in vain to keep Cookie from playing fort under the table and finally just gave up as my girls joined together with the other children present in a ‘Lord of the Flies’ like mob and chased each other around the table, I was reminded of my last post here.

Humm… so maybe Supermom was pushing it a tiny bit.

posted at 8:02 AM  
Labels: Parenting